Thursday, October 30, 2014

Rules over madness

I woke up to see my nightlight being engulfed in darkness. I closed my eyes trying to pretend that it was not there but the sound of the carpet moving was too eager to remind me to be afraid. The thing breathed and its breathing sounded like a thousand child’s screams and its smell came from the darkest pits of hell no doubt. I kept my breathing down, for which I knew that if I pretended to sleep and it was convincing enough, that this monstrous darkness would leave me in peace for yet another night. But then I got this unknown courage to throw back the blankets and look it in the face, if it even had a face. I couldn’t stop myself as my eye lids flew open and my arms moved swiftly to uncover my body. My mouth wouldn’t open no matter how much I wanted to scream. It was like someone sat me up to face the dark mass. My feet hit the floor and I was inches away from the pale white face or mask of a thing that I knew outwitted me. “Child…” it spoke in at least five different voices. My mouth opened but did not speak. It looked at me with its black nothingness eyes then began to speak once more. “Why are you awake? Are you afraid of a higher power? Are you afraid that your god cannot protect you from me? What are you afraid of?” it said as it bowed to me and touched my cheek with its long black wispy finger. It was cold yet somehow reassuring but menacing and still wanted. I set my hands on my lap and I began to speak. “I was jolted awake by your unprepared arrival,” I stood up and turned on my lamp. “I would have made you something nice and cleaned up a bit before you had come.” I motioned to the room that had piles of close and body parts lying about. “Now as goes for power,” I looked down at my hands, “I crave it, and you can say I need it.” I looked up. I had no idea why all my deepest thoughts and wants were showing themselves now, but it felt somehow right. “In the past three days I had dismembered at least five homeless people and two highly proclaimed business men and all of their eyes were dug up by a spoon and put in a glass jar. And here you are asking me if my god would protect me,” I laughed. “I am a god in my own right.” The creatures smile grew. “Now being afraid of something…” I put on a quizzical look and thought for a moment. “ I suppose I am afraid of being anything less than a god that rules over madness.”


  1. It was interesting how you turned a paranormal encounter into a conversation. The dialogue between the narrator and the creature were very different. I like your character's sense of empowerment, especially at the end. A quote I really liked is, “In the past three days I had dismembered at least five homeless people and two highly proclaimed business men and all of their eyes were dug up by a spoon and put in a glass jar.."
    This quote has exceptional imagery, and so does your entire story. Good job!

  2. At first I thought this was going to be a scary paranormal story where the demon possesses you and yadda yadda yadda, but no. I loved how you turned it into a story where you are the scarer and you are able to talk to this demon with confidence. Very well written :)

  3. I agree with Katie and Collin--your story is surprising and sinister and it's so interesting how your narrator remains calm and matches herself to the demon, even surpasses this creature she is supposed to be threatened by. Very creative, Ashley.